Chapter 4

``What's wrong, Hasekura-san?''

Asked Rei's advisor Yamamura-sensei, after keeping still.

``Your heart isn't in it. If you hold your sword like this, you won't get anywhere.''

``I see.''

``President, I know it's a bit annoying but, can we go and see the underclassmen practicing? Hasekura-san, a minute please.''

Rei was urged out by her sensei, so they walked together out of the martial arts practice area. Rei had no choice but to go along. If she had been demoted to the first-year level in the middle of her practice for the match, then she had really lost it. She had never lost a single match since joining the club.

``I know it's impolite of me to ask why.''

Yamamura-sensei walked up to the outside wall of the practice area and laughed. That sound. Yamamura-sensei was probably doing this to help a club member out. News of Sachiko and Yumi-chan's battle had gotten out quickly amongst the teachers.

Walking up to the wall, she began to listen to the practice plans in the warm air. It seemed far away now.

The first two days after Yoshino had returned the rosary she did not remember very well, but gradually the hole in her heart had started to fill up, and a dry wind began to blow in her heart. The hurt she had felt after Yoshino-san returned her rosary would never heal in this lifetime, and it seemed like she had given up hope.

Rei knew that something she had done was completely wrong. She didn't know what she had done wrong, but she couldn't help but think it was the worst thing possible. A kind of thing that would make it natural for Yoshino to leave me. Rei was a person who had some sort of large defect in her heart somewhere.

But Yumi-chan had heard Yoshino-san's story and understood how she had felt. She wanted to understand also, and so her dry heart thirsted for Yoshino's moisture.

Once more she wanted to hug Yoshino with these hands. Once more she wanted to see that beautiful heart, worn with a soft smile.

``Hasekura-san, is something wrong because Shimazu Yoshino-san is not here?''

Said with a stoid face, Yamamura-sensei's words had somehow pierced the heart of the matter. The graduates of Lilian were smart. They didn't lose sight of the goal.

``Yoshino-san isn't here ......?''

She tried not to think about it. Like matter to a person's mind, Rei had always taken for granted Yoshino being around her. Up till now in her life, she could in no way believe that Yoshino would not be at her side.

``Shimazu Yoshino-san is your strong and gentle friend, isn't she? And if she wasn't here, then you wouldn't be yourself, would you?''

``I'm not myself?''

``A little bit. The Rei-sama you now is different from the Rei-sama you had always been before.''

So then, what kind of a person was she. She was good at Kendo, and her gentleness came from only taking care of Yoshino, so - -.

``I'm not the kind of person you think I am, sensei.''

She was a coward, she was alone, and she was a crybaby. There was no way she could be called a strong person. This was the truth. If Yoshino was not at her side, she could do nothing. She realized that, because Yoshino had been there, she had become strong.

Tears began to flow. This was the first time she cried since Yoshino had left. Yoshino's parting had been such a shock that she had forgotten how to cry. Yamamura-sensei was surprised at Rei-sama's tears, but oddly enough, she let Rei cry on her shoulder just like an Onee-sama.

``Sensei.''

At last her tears dried. Rei had wanted to ask someone this.

``Was I a burden to Yoshino-san? Because without knowing it, I had come closer and closer to her.''

``I don't really know.''

Yamamura-sensei said.

``You did get close to her, but I think you're wrong about being a burden to her. If you had an honest relationship with her, shouldn't some hard work be able to patch it together again? Even though Shimazu-san returned the rosary, she hasn't died, has she? She's still living, and right next door to you, right?'' (Me: Notice that, Yamamura-sensei being a Lilian graduatee and not a student or a teacher, she calls Yoshino Shimazu-san here.)

``......Yeah.''

``Then everything's OK, isn't it?''

After Rei rose her face from sensei's shoulder, it felt like Yamamura-sensei's sermon was done. Yamamura-sensei turned back towards the practice room and went ahead. But then, remembering something, Yamamura-sensei turned back towards Rei.

``You don't have the manners of a first year. You're 50 times worse.''

``Oh.''

``Good luck at the match, president.''

Yamamura-sensei's gave Rei a thumbs up.

Rei nodded, took her sword, and went out. For some reason, it seemed like a wonderful power had burst through her.

Good luck.

Everyone always wished her good luck.